During my kidney transplant, I realized that the sangat
was my real family. The surgery was a watershed event. Guruji made me see and realise a lot of things. I learnt the truth about relatives, for I saw their real faces.
I also had second thoughts about my kidney donation to my dad, for I got a bad back spasm due to the scar tissue that formed after the operation. I was unable to move for a few days, and soon had to undergo physiotherapy every day. In the interim, I changed five doctors.
I met a devotee, Shri Sharma, outside my physiotherapy clinic and was invited for a satsang
to be held at Select Citywalk on a Tuesday. On Monday somehow I went to Bade Mandir. On Tuesday, I went to the satsang where I heard a devotee talking about how Guruji had told someone to have four langars
. The message bore home. The next day I went to Shivani's house and the message was reaffirmed. Shivani told me that Guruji had told her to have four langars in a row. I returned home and told my husband, Anuj. He agreed to take me for four consecutive langars to the Bade Mandir.
We went to the Mandir on the Thursday of that week. On Friday, we were stuck in a jam for four hours, due to the many weddings that were taking place in the venues around the route. When we reached home, I confessed to Anuj that I would not be able to go to the Mandir again. That night I had a bad headache and I knew it was due to the traffic jam. Guruji was again testing us, I felt.
In the morning I went to a new physiotherapist suggested by a devotee of Guruji. I had got her appointment with difficulty—but her treatment made me better by half. Very happily, I called my husband and told him that I would go to the Mandir. Again, he offered to take me and said that we would find another route to reach the Mandir. I was scared of the jam, still we went to the ashram
and with Guruji's grace we got zero traffic on both Saturday and Sunday. It was still wedding time, so the lack of traffic was not explainable. After four langars, I began healing and was absolutely fine. I began working out and was back to my normal self in a week.
Blessings in disguise: Cancer is detected and then vanishes
However, soon after, I suffered through a lot of pain. Even the doctors were surprised at the intensity and duration of the pain. I used to ask Guruji why I had to suffer. I was given an answer during a satsang but could not trust it.
The satsang had been hosted at a devotee's house. I was meditating, when I found myself opening my eyes at the mention of cancer being worked out and healed through a kidney donation. I told myself that I was overthinking. After a few days, a friend and devotee, Gayatri told me to get a copper tumbler blessed at the Bade Mandir. Even though I brought the lota
and took it on Shivratri day to the Mandir, I kept wondering why I should have it blessed as the lota is for people with life-threatening diseases. As if in response to my subconscious desire, it so happened that my lota did not get blessed on Shivratri.
A day before Shivratri, I had gone to my gynaecologist and she had done a routine check for cervical cancer. I had thought nothing of it. After ten days I got a call from my gynaecologist's clinic. They wanted me to come to the clinic along with my husband. I went alone, and the gynaecologist said that my reports were not good and I had an infection. She insisted on meeting me with my husband. That evening I went to my homeopath for my kids and showed him the reports. He was shocked, but told me not to ask him about the reports. He started me on his medicines. I came home with the distinct feeling that something was wrong.
I called my maternal aunt who is a doctor and gave her the report over the phone. She told me that it suggested there was a tumor in the uterus which was in a pre-cancerous stage. I couldn't believe it. Then it sunk in. So I went to the Bade Mandir with the lota and the sewadaars
asked me for what disease I was getting the lota blessed. Now, I could tell them, whereas earlier on Shivratri, I couldn't have.
The cycle of going to doctors and getting tests done began again. My friend Shivani advised me to go to the Bangla Sahib for prayer. And another friend, Payal, a Sardarni who has great faith in Bangla Sahib, called me to get my tests done a second time from a different diagnostic centre. I told her that first I wanted to go to the Bangla Sahib, eat prasad there and then go for my test. I did so: I went for langar on Thursday and Friday to Bangla Sahib and then gave my tests.
One week went by and during that week my uncle sent prasad from Siddhi Vinayak. After I ate that prasad, I vomited a lot and then slept. When I woke up, I felt very positive and as if cured. I rationalized that Guruji may have wanted me to have prasad from these places.
My reports were due the coming week so I again went to Bangla Sahib. An emergency at the hospital meant the report couldn't be done. That week, on Friday, I went to Bade Mandir, prayed to Guruji for a lot of langar and got it. That day too the reports didn't come out as the OPD was shut. The next day I was sitting in Guruji's durbar
at my good friend Shivani's place, where I got the news that all my reports were negative and that no cancer cells were present!
You could surmise that the earlier testing at the gynaecologist's was incorrect, but I know it's only Guruji's blessings and the langar that healed me. I also understand now that the kidney donation and the suffering was his way of taking out the cancer inside my body.
Guruji keeps testing us and demolishing our karma. We should just surrender and never ever question his doings. If we completely surrender without any ifs and buts, then we will see how our lives change for the better and for the highest, that is, Kalyan
Guruji has given me a new life. I love you so much, Guruji.
Mamta Agarwal, a devotee