Guruji and me: A bond of love and trust

Mahima Wassan, February 2016
My journey with Guruji began in 2009. Initially, I was reluctant to accept Him; I thought that God could not be physically seen; however, that perspective soon changed.

One day I was taking leave after having langar prasad in Bade Mandir. I bowed in front of Guruji's jhoola and I was stunned: There in the glass behind the jhoola appeared Guruji Himself in a mesmerising yellow chola, looking at me with a loving smile. One hand was below His chin. I was wondering how a person who isn't physically alive can appear out of the blue in a mirror. I was scared! I looked around to check if the image was being projected via any device, but I couldn't find anything. I folded my hands and thanked Him for this blessing. Then I ran away from the spot, not realising that God Himself had appeared for me. I then remembered my complaint: That though devotees got Guruji's darshan at his jhoola, I didn't. Later I was humbled by His love: He had come especially for me alone to give His darshan.

Soon I wanted Guruji's darshan and would wait for Him at night to come and bless me. I kept on waiting for three to four days, but no visitation was forthcoming. I finally gave up hope one night and went to my bedroom to sleep. On my way to the bedroom, I saw a Ferrero Rocher sweet and decided to eat it. I opened the wrapper to find the chocolate had melted and formed a beautiful Om on the wrapper. I was ecstatic and realised that Guruji never disappoints His devotees. He is omnipresent and omniscient. He loves us all so dearly that even the smallest of our needs are attended to by Him.

He truly runs our world and under His protection there is nothing but love so immerse that if you drench yourself in Him, you shall find heaven.

Guruji takes care of my mother and me

Our loving Guruji's grace is always with us even when we aren't aware of it. Nothing can hurt us—not even our sins, negative thoughts and bad karmas.

Year 2016 proved it to me. It began as a very tough year—mentally and physically, I was thoroughly tested by Guruji. The trial period I faced was due to my past karmas, which had followed nature's course. How much karma could affect me was all taken care of by Guruji. Guruji indicated to me that the negative events that had unfolded would have occurred in my 30s, when the situation would have worsened.

The year began with my mom not keeping well. I dreamt that my mom had passed away. My father had passed away when I was 11, and this nightmare shocked me. I was uneasy and kept to myself, crying when I was alone.

Soon my thoughts had taken a toll on my health. It was as if I was living the nightmare. One night I found it difficult to breathe and told mom to take me to the hospital. I quickly grabbed Guruji's picture with me and held Him in my arms. At the hospital, everything turned out to be all right. It was only an excess of acid that had led to the breathing problem. I thanked Guruji for reassuring me of His love and care.

However, mentally I remained on a downhill course. Over the course of the month, I became filled with negative thoughts and was on the verge of depression. I would overthink everything and constantly worry about myself and mom.

Guruji's undying love for me saved me. He gave me a new life. Every time I felt I couldn't do something or I started to worry about my well-being, He was with me telling me to be calm, that everything was all right and that I need not worry about anything. As if by magic I would be fine.

During my difficult phase I would dream that I was in Guruji's abode and He was taking care of me. In a vision, I saw Guruji's abode. It was a simple hut with a manji, a fireplace and a few other things. It was at a very high altitude. A beautiful waterfall ran outside. It was simply ethereal. That Guruji was safeguarding me in His abode was a sign that nothing could harm me whatsoever.

Till date, I always get peace of mind when I imagine His home. I saw a vision where Guruji was fighting with my graha; He would scold the graha and tell it to leave me alone.

As a result of His blessings and His care, each day I felt healed. I used to do mantra jaap. Soon my negative thoughts turned positive. The power of His grace is such that He can becalm your mind and give you peace and stability. Mantra jaap truly is very powerful, as is His name. Recite it and you shall feel all your ignorance run away.

Through all of this I came out stronger, more positive and with a daily increasing love towards Guruji. I surrender everything to Him and in turn ask for Guruji himself, because during my difficult time He was the only one holding my hand and guiding me through, reassuring me of His kripa.

Now I know that no matter how times are, good or bad, your Guru never abandons you. In fact He keeps you closer. Most important is what Guruji told me through my trial period: "Manngo nahi, manno." (Don't ask, have faith). This is what has led me to light from darkness. It is as if from a never-ending abyss of ignorance, I have been shown the truth—Guruji.

I want to thank Him for everything and to tell people to trust Him completely, because once you surrender nothing can happen to you. Remember, He loves us more than we can love ourselves. He knows what's good for us; we do not. Our vision and logic is shortsighted; His is all-knowing. Hence, we must learnto trust Him and accept everything He bestows on us.

He bestows unconditional and everlasting love and mercy on us. Had He not been here, I wouldn't know what life is. He is so merciful and loving that our list of wants will get exhausted but His kripa on us will only keep increasing. Trust Him and you shall always find a way.

My life is you, Guruji. Each breath I take, every word, every thought has you in it.

I sincerely wish all readers all the best in life.

Om Namah Shivay, Shivji Sada Sahay
Om Namah Shivay, Guruji Sada Sahay

Mahima Wassan, a devotee

February 2016